Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Big C Downdate

Boi-oi-oinnng. Welcome to Attitude Smackdown! Feelin' better, are ya? Well, here's my reminder that good times don't last, either. I know just how Buddy feels.

First, the labs showed I have almost no RBC (1.87) or WBC (3.6), and Hgb was just 6.0. So I was sent immediately for a blood transfusion. I think this was my first-ever blood transfusion; I don't even think I got blood during my Stem Cell Transplant. It turned out to be a 4-hour joyride of tedium and discomfort. I was just so happy about jumping ship from the clinical trial, and the visit from Supergirl 1, and seeing my neighbors again, that I just refused to notice how quickly I was circling the drain.

Second, the PET scan report was full of not-good news. I was amused, however, that the radiologist used the phrase "moth-eaten" three times. Describing my neck, "Lytic bony lesions throughout the cervical spine are again demonstrated with an overall increased patchy, moth-eaten appearance compared to August 2008." The exact same verbiage describes my ribs and pelvis. I have a seriously moth-eaten (appearing) skeletal structure. I guess it's too late to try snacking on mothballs.

Third, the next round of chemo is Cytoxin. You know when "toxin" is right there in the drug name, we're talkin' Big Guns. The free ride is over. More steroids, bring on the Crazies and the Diabetes. And bye-bye curls, hello Baldini.

Well, I'm not going to say, "it could be worse."

11 comments:

Kathy from NJ said...

I am so so sorry.

John said...

I'm trying to think of something clever to cheer you up but I'm coming up empty. I've had cytoxan. It's whopper chemo; you won't feel good, and yes, your hair will fall out. But, it can be an effective bad plasma cell killer. I don't pray, but I'm rooting for you and still think you are mean enough to out relapse the myeloma.

There's a lot of folks you've never met that love you Nancy. I'm one of em...

Holly said...

I love your style, LaCoot. I think it's "healthy" to once in a while feel "No, there is nothing worse." You share yourself and your story with others, so I belive it's ok to drop any pretense and feel the way you to choose to feel in the moment and have the guts to say it. You are blessed in so many ways and I hope you have a great Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

Rootin' for ya over here as well.

tim's wife said...

La Coot,
Well dang. Someone needs to bitch slap your fairy Godmother cause there's a rule against getting yucky news around the holidays.
If it's any help, Tim didn't get sick with the 4 day drip of CDEP.
Thinking of you and sending prayers, vibes, strength, peace.... whatever it is you need today.

Sandy said...

There's enough 'toxin' in mothballs that eating them would probably get you glowing - and all we want is for you to feel better. I intend that you have a really enjoyable holiday visit and that your return to the chemical company will bring some kind of turnaround to knock off those evil cells. I hate this (blankin') disease.

Beth said...

You're in my thoughts, Nancy.

Will you have oral Cytoxan or IV? Load up on anti-emetics, if you think you'll need them.

Do you feel better after the transfusion?

Margaret said...

I'm with Sandy. You make sure to kick and punch those evil cells right smack in the teeth and get yourself out of that (expletive deleted) drain. You can do it!
Thinking of you and sending you a big hug from Firenze...

Michelle@Gotchababy said...

Oh Nancy--where the heck is your fairygodmother? I agree with Tim's wife, she's clearly slacking.

Sending prayers your way....

Anonymous said...

Oh Nancy, I'm so sorry. I don't know what else to say to express that any stronger.
hugs and more hugs,
christie

Karen said...

Aw, man. Crappity, crap, crap, crap.