Big C Update

I've been savoring a week of gloriously cool weather. Sometimes it even stops raining! Today was one of those days. My gigantic "miniature" Korean lilacs are in full bloom, making me grateful their bloom time is quite short. Too much of a good thing.

Today was the last day of chemo vacation. I felt so good that I mowed the front yard, for the first time in more than a year --and only because my trusty ancient Toro starts very easily. It's a pretty big yard, especially from behind the mower, but I managed, and felt very accomplished. I even did a bit of weeding and planting. I paid for it later, in back pain and exhaustion, but I think that's my life now: a series of trade-offs. A two-hour nap had me almost as good as new. It was still sunny and cool-but-not-cold, so I took the Mollinator for an afternoon walk. We got to visit with a few hoodies along the way, of course. A very good day.

Which makes starting chemo tomorrow even harder. It will make me a little nauseous, crankier than usual, and tired but buzzed from the steroids. (I'll also have the whole diabetes deal for about 48 hours after each steroid dose. Yeah, three or four belly shots a day. Whee.) I'll feel a little worse the day after, then a tiny bit better on Wednesday, but then have to go back Thursday for another smackdown. I'll feel exponentially worse with each dose, and just when I'm sure I can't take it anymore... it's chemo vacation time. I'm always amazed at how the dosages and vacations are timed so perfectly.

But I can hang tough a little bit longer; unless my doc tells me otherwise, this is my last chemo cycle. I know it sounds crazy, but I will miss it a little bit. The nurses and techs have been absolutely wonderful. Day after day, patient after patient, they are kind, gentle and compassionate. They have always treated me as an individual and appreciated my humor -- or done a damn fine job of pretending. I will miss running into folks I know: a friend of a friend, a blog reader, people from the MM support group. I will miss it... "like a bunion."